I am working with Pema Chodron's Compassion Cards this year. I pick a card at random every week, put it somewhere I can see it, and try to focus on this lesson. One lesson a week.
This week's card: "Abandon any hope of fruition."
On the back it says: "The key instruction is to stay in the present. Don't get caught up in hopes of what you'll achieve and how good your situation will be some day in the future. What you do right now is what matters."
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This is the perfect card for me right now.
There's so little that I'm able to get done in any given day. I have a long list of things that have gone by the wayside in the last few years.
I want to get started on them. I want to check things off my big list.
Healing from this last spine surgery is a study in the present. I feel so much better than I did after the low back surgery that I feel like I should be able to do more.
I am only able to get done a few things a day.
While I know that I am a human being, and not a human doing, I really do like to get things done.
There is simply so much to do that I find myself overwhelmed and frustrated. Grumpy. I spent most of the days grumbling and shuffling around the house. It's absurd.
This week, I'll make every effort to focus on the present only and abandon any hope of fruition. The present is all I have. I may as well enjoy it as it will change soon enough.
I wonder if this will work...
