Simply Kind Tuesdays : Week 44 : You never know when you need a little kindness.
Once a year, when I got to my Optometrist, Dr. Sumner, I come face to face with my horrendous childhood. Our laughing visit always takes a downward turn when he puts the drops in and leaves the room. It’s time to dilate my eyes so he can look at my retina.
You see, the eyes record of every violent, abusive act. Like a stamp, every violent act imprints itself on the retina.
While I wait for my eyes to ‘dilate really wide,’ so he can see the folds, tears, holes and damage from my early life, I have to face myself and my past. When Dr. Sumner returns, I’m usually very sad. I sniffle, wipe a few tears while he gets ready to look at my retina.
In the past, I’ve seen doctors who will look in my eyes and say, “What the hell happened to you?”
There I am, blinded, with my big dark eyes dilated, trying to explain my early life – schizophrenic mother, depressed father, alcoholic grandfather, and… and…
Dr. Sumner is much kinder than that. He usually smiles then says, “Let’s take a look.”
We go through the various lens and lights. He tells me what he’s doing. Then usually ends with:
“Everything’s still settled. That’s good. We’ll check again next year.”
Kindness.
You never know when you need it. And sometimes, the kindest thing is a good hearted man who doesn’t say the obvious.
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If you get a chance, please consider donating to provide school supplies for Iraqi kids. They deserve a chance. We can give it for less than the cost of a pizza.
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When I dare to be powerful, to use my strength in the service of my vision, then it becomes less and less important whether I am afraid.
Audre Lorde 1934–1992
American Poet
TWMark – Thanks for the quote – I think it’s very appropriate!
wow. i didn’t know the eyes did that. i remember having my eyes dilated often as a child. having to wear the bulky plastic glasses and my dad taking me out to lunch and then staying home from school the rest of the day. i recently went to the doctor but declined the dilation because i didn’t trust myself to drive with wide open eyes. i wonder what my retinas say about my early life. i also had a hellish childhood.
i am glad you have a kind doctor who exhibits compassion and empathy towards his patients.
I didn’t know that either, about the retinas. I’d like to know more about how that works.
I’m very glad that you are surrounded by love and kindness in your present life
Jehara – The abuse damages the retina – I have folds, tears and holes from it. I have area’s of no sight in both eyes. Do you see floaters?
Heart in SF – Amazing how the body holds on. I’ve very fortunate in my currently life – yea!!