On a limb with Claudia

Yesterday, I decided to escape the city for a while and go for a hike. I took the dog and headed off into Mount Falcon Open Space . I had the best intentions of spending an hour or so then heading back to my desk and back to the computer. Carefully, I plotted out the most efficient route.

And promptly got lost. In my defense, the critical junction was covered in a foot of snow. It was impossible to see where the trails went so we followed a set of recent, but snowed on, foot prints. Three hours later we stumbled out to the car.

The hike was glorious. We saw deer and eagles. We watched the birds dance together in the sky. My dog ran back and forth from place to place as she uncovered exciting new smells and interesting terrain. We were almost completely alone among the ponderosa pines. It was so quiet and beautiful. The beauty alone took my breath away. On one side of the mountain, it must have been 60 degrees, when the other side was covered in at least a foot of snow. It was an amazing experience.

Throughout the hike, I struggled to stay present using all of the Open Grove tricks – focus on your breath, let go of thoughts, and on and on. It was so easy to get caught up in the drama of being lost, taking too long hiking, or not being in control. Yet, all that mattered was happening right in front of me – the birds, deer, my dancing laughing dog, breathless vistas, and muffled silence of the pines. When I was able to let go enough to be present and trust that everything works out, I had a fabulous time. Getting lost was the best thing that could have happened yesterday.

When I returned, I finished everything that I needed to and even had time to have dinner with a good friend. I got lost, let go of control, and trusted that it would all get done. I think that’s an experience of grace.

I hope you have a chance to get lost this week. It’s well worth the journey.

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I have this thing about electric can openers. They never work. My grandfather had an avocado green and a bright yellow electric can opener. Neither worked. He routinely opened cans with the traditional hand held model. Every time he opened a can, he would rant about how electric can openers were a waste of money because they never worked. My mother, however, never actually listened to anything he said and frequently asked him to purchase her an electronic can opener. She thought they were sophisticated. I have numerous childhood memories of him ranting about the electronic can opener while she is acting hurt because he doesn’t love her enough to give her one. Classic dysfunctional opera.

Recently, I had a dream about a white electronic can opener (with a short white cord in case you were wondering). In the dream, I pull this electronic can opener out of a bag and look at it wondering, “why do I have this?” I was relating this story to our friend and board member Darryl Perry. I couldn’t help but add the “electronic can openers never work” rant that I probably learned from my grandfather.

In response, he sent me a few links. It turns out that electronic can openers are so routinely broken that there are numerous web pages discussing how to fix them. Bob Villa states that electronic can openers are a necessity. I suppose the electronic can opener repair guy is also a necessity! EHow has another idea about fixing them. And this woman has moved her electronic can opener 3 times! Poor thing. Her husband must be an electronic can opener repair person.

Here’s is my suggestion for fixing your electronic can opener:

1) Unplug the can opener.
2) Throw it in the trash. Do not donate it to a charity because they can not afford to get it fixed!
3) Open your cans with a traditional can opener. 76 year old friend Toni suggests a Tupperware can opener if you have trouble with your hands.

Just a thought for a Friday!

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It’s really popular to criticize our government. And frankly, there are a lot of reasons to criticize our government. It’s also our “right” in a democratic society to criticize the government. But what does it really get us?

Does criticizing the government get us:
~ less taxes?
~ smarter, more productive civil servants?
~ happier life?

I don’t think so.

Criticizing the government makes us feel smart and stupid at the same time. We are smart because we are better than the mistake ridden government. We feel stupid because these people represent us to the world.

Let’s face it. The elections have been over for a long time. It’s time to stop crying in our milk and get on with it.

Why not try something new this year? Why not wish our government and all of it’s employees a good year? Why not wish them love and light? How about sending a little loving kindness in their direction this year? This doesn?t mean you have to believe everything they say or even agree with the current administration. You don’t even have to like them. You are simply sending a little positive energy to help the government get the job done.

You’ll feel better – less stupid and more hopeful. Who knows? It might actually do some good.

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Every once in a while, a stranger breaks into our house. He doesn’t steal or break anything. In fact, the only thing he does is leave the toilet seat up. I know what you are thinking but no one here would be so inconsiderate as to leave the toilet seat up. This pesky stranger secretly enters our home, heads straight for the bathroom and leaves the seat up. It’s annoying but not dangerous, right?

It turns out that leaving the toilet seat up literally robs us of our prosperity. In my conversation with Gabrielle Alizay, author of Feng Shui for the rest of us, she discussed of the importance of leaving the toilet seat down. (This interview will be released this week in our “Awaken” audio magazine.) It turns out that abundance is literally pulled down the drain when the toilet seat is left up. This is also true if the sink and tub drains are open or if you leave the bathroom door open.

My guess is that this stranger has known this fact all along and has purposely and intentionally sent our prosperity – uh – into the toilet. At least that’s what I am going to tell the police the next time I discover the toilet seat up.

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Brought to my attention by Rob Brezney, this is a list of 10 Media Fed Myths.

Oddly enough, it doesn’t include global warming. You see according to the Utne reader there are 928 peer-reviewed scientific jouranl articles about global warming published between 1993 and 2003. Every single article states that global warming is caused by humans. On the other hand, there are 3,543 hard-news stories about global warming published by the New York Times, Washington Post, Los Angeles Times, and Wall Street Journal between 1988 and 2002. Of those 53% of those articles cast doubt that human beings are the cause of global warming.

Makes you wonder what else we’re missing….

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It occurs to me that life would be much simpler if there was an International Blame Council. This council would have been created by the United Nations to determine who was to blame for a variety of large and small issues. There would be a set of rules and, if you had trouble determining who was to blame, you could petition the International Blame Council and they would make a ruling.

Think of how many marriages this would save! Husbands and wives could get an external ruling on who was to blame for any small – “the house is a mess” – or large – “your family hates me” – issue.

There would be a rule book which each of us could live by. And maybe even points. You know, you have 2 blame points to my 1 blame point so you are to blame.

Let’s look at the issue of global warming. We could quickly assign blame points to every nation and determine who held the majority blame vote. In this position, said country (most likely the United States) would be require to do something about their blame points.

Celebrities could post their blame points. Brad Pitt gets 2 blame points for destroying his marriage by loving someone else and Jennifer Aniston gets 2 blame points for being crazy. They could post their blame points on a website and the world would finally know who was to blame.

It occurs to me that life would be much simpler if there was an International Blame Council. This council would have been created by the United Nations to determine who was to blame for a variety of large and small issues. There would be a set of rules and, if you had trouble determining who was to blame, you could petition the International Blame Council and they would make a ruling.

Think of how many marriages this would save! Husbands and wives could get an external ruling on who was to blame for any small – “the house is a mess” – or large – “your family hates me” – issues.

There would be a rule book which each of us could live by. And maybe even points. You know, you have 2 blame points to my 1 blame point so you are to blame.

Let’s look at the issue of global warming. We could quickly assign blame points to every nation and determine who held the majority blame vote. In this position, said country (most likely the United States) would be require to do something about their blame points.

Celebrities could post their blame points. Brad Pitt gets 2 blame points for destroying his marriage by loving someone else and Jennifer Aniston gets 2 blame points for being crazy. They could post their blame points on a website and the world would finally know who was to blame.

It might not work. Politics are politics and people are people. The country with the most blame points might decide that the council held no sway over them or something like that. Celebrities might lie over their blame points causing endless speculation in the press. It could get very messy and complicated.

We could always adopt the Buddhist teaching that there is no blame. (“Like a solid rock is not shaken by the wind, so the wise are not moved by praise or blame.” – Dhammapada, 81) But that would require a lot of spiritual work and frankly, wouldn’t you like to know who is to blame for things?

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Recently, we held a little ceremony where each person was symbolically “let go” of 3 things in his or her life and symbolically “invited in” 3 other things. I was amazed that everyone’s wishes were similar.

Every single person wanted to be debt free. Given that everyone at the party was 41 years old, much of our debt stems from the introduction of credit cards to our lives in college. We were the original guinea pigs testing the combination of credit cards and college students for disastrous results. Outside of the guy who lived in San Francisco in the high flying Reagan years, most of our debt originates in college.

I was fascinated by this Scientific American column about debt and bankruptcy. (Scientific American: Forgive Us Our Debts Explaining the rising tide of bankruptcy) You see when I started college many of my friends stated that they would borrow the maximum on their credit cards and student loans then declare bankruptcy on them when they graduated from college. After all, they would have no income and no way to pay for their debt. Anti-social? Of course. This irresponsible attitude also created the “everyone is a criminal” payment rules for student loans and starter credit cards.

Can we eliminate out of debt? According to the folks at the Daily Reckoning, we must eliminate our personal debt. Period. In Empire of Debt, Bill Bonner and Addison Wiggins discuss their belief that the decline of the American empire is almost solely based in unprecedented over-spending and debting. (Addison Wiggins joins us for our “Awakening” Audio Magazine due to be released January 15, 2006)

Here at the Open Grove, we believe that it is not only financial debt but also a more personal, almost energetic, debt stemming for over stimulation and over commitment that is creates the discomfort of most Americans. As you begin to make your lists of the things you would like to “let go” of and “add” to your life, we urge you to consider giving up the habit of financial and energetic debting and adapt a more balanced, reciprocal attitude to everything in your life.

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Around New Year’s Eve, I went to see Slim Cessna’s Auto Club at the encouragement of our friend Rick Baca. (More on that later!) Around midnight, Slim introduced someone he called “his hero”. It was an aged (read: obese) Jello Biafra.

Jello Biafra was the lead singer in a 1980′s band called the Dead Kennedys. He was well known for his politically charged rapid fire singing and wicked temper. (Here’s a link to his actual bio.) People call him “punk” now, but he never really was and truly isn’t now.

Anyway, I saw the Dead Kennedy’s last show in Berkeley, CA. Rick encouraged me to speak with Jello and see what he had to say. I am sorry I did.

His rapid-fire tongue has turned to complete and utter bitterness. In less than 5 minutes, he told me how he had been betrayed (naming names) by any number of people, how he was right and what I needed to do to win his approval. He went on to grandiosely discuss his current projects and current friends.

And I thought, “what a waste!” Jello Biafra is now a middle-aged mockery of a younger, healthier and more vibrant self. In a way, he has become the epitome of what he used to despise.

After Jello finished spewing his bitter diatribe, he turned back to his adoring fans and I walked back to my friends.

I suppose all of our childhood heroes tend to fade into nothingness. It’s just too bad that “I am right and you are wrong” seems to have captured the mind and energy of someone so alive and capable. For me, it stands as a warning: ?don?t take yourself too seriously?, ?notice your opportunities?, ?live with gratitude and grace? or you?ll turn out like Jello Biafra!

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It will be an exciting year here at the Open Grove. We have a variety of projects designed to support you in your every day life. Look for an announcement this week that will include our schedule for next year as well as some fun and interesting projects for you to participate in!

Many blessings in the New Year!

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